Month: February 2011

As we wind up this President’s Day, let me pose a question: Do you think you will see a woman elected president of the U.S. in your lifetime? Why or why not?

I love books. Give some of the credit for that to Curious George and some to my mother. As a lover of the written word, I’m always sorry to hear about the demise of any bookstore. So I’m sad to hear the news about Borders Bookstores’ problems. http://tinyurl.com/4r2eh4k

In my house, books are considered great gifts to give and receive. In fact, some of my unread gifts are piled on the floor of our living room turned library. I plan to read some of these now that my life is a little less hectic than it has been for the last four years.

Before I tackle the pile, I’m reading a book I just purchased (and mentioned in an earlier post), Iron Butterflies by Birute Regine.

My love for books started long before I could read. I don’t remember going to book stores back then, but trips to Knoxville’s Murphy branch library were an almost weekly adventure.

My mom or one of my five siblings would walk with me to the library up the hill from our apartment to Murphy branch, a low red brick building filled with rows of shiny wooden tables and chairs and shelf after shelf of books, new and worn.

 I remember the smell of the books and the cool quiet in the library. We didn’t have air conditioning at home so on hot Tennessee days, I would spend hours at Murphy branch looking at picture books and eventually reading hundreds of the books there.

One of the proudest days of my young life was when I could write my name. Writing my name meant I could sign for my own red and white plastic library card. The first time I ran my fingers over the raised lettering that spelled out my name on the card was unforgettable. Walking home clutching an armload of books that I had checked out with my new card made me feel grown up.

Even after I learned to read, having my mother read to me was always a treat.  All of us would crowd on the couch around her and spill onto the floor as she read Horton Hears a Who! or Curious George Rides a Bike, two of my early favorites.

My mother is still a great reader. On a recent car trip from Richmond back to Knoxville, she read to me from Charles Kuralt’s  America as we drove south on Interstate 81 hugging the Appalachian Mountains.

 The last book I read was Paint the Sky Purple by local author, Vanessa Womack. She signed it and gave it to me in August 2010. I didn’t get around to reading it until I took time off at Thanksgiving.  http://tinyurl.com/4jltunq

I feel a little ashamed to admit that it took me that long to read it.  Now, I don’t have any excuse not to find time to read more and I won’t feel guilty if I pick up a book or two at Varina library’s book sale this weekend (Feb.26).  http://tinyurl.com/4a93yuv

Read any good books lately?

Howard. That’s the one guy I seriously would have considered using a bad boyfriend voodoo doll on if they had existed back then. http://tinyurl.com/5vqpc5g

We had dated for months. Without much warning, he broke up with me for another woman.

Boy was I mad! Mad enough to stick pins in a Howard doll and wish harm on the real guy? On second thought, I guess not.

I admit that like most women I have thought about getting revenge on a few men who have done me wrong. I’ve gone so far as to plot ways to get even. But I never acted on those plans.

Maybe just planning revenge helped me get over the anger. Other times, I got past the rage by writing.

When Howard picked the other woman over me, I wrote a poem. It was a bitter poem. I’ve never shown it to anyone.

But it helped and I moved on. Howard married, and then divorced the woman he dumped me for. Meanwhile, I’ve been happily married for 25 years.

So as Valentine’s Day rolls around and you think about the last guy who mistreated you, disrespected you, or who was just a jerk, don’t be tempted to exact revenge.

Find other ways to get past the anger. There are a lot more useful and fun ways to spend your time and energy.

What’s your best way of overcoming anger and that burning desire to get revenge. And for the record, country singer Carrie Underwood is not a good role model on this topic. http://tinyurl.com/nxjk6v

 

Where were you and what were you doing at 7:30 this morning?

I don’t mean to get too personal but if you’re like most women you were already out of bed and getting ready for work.  More than likely you were shipping the kids off to school and had checked your smart phone for e-mails and news. Maybe you had even figured out what to cook for dinner tonight.

Sometimes it feels like the guys in those old Army commercials: Women do more before 9 a.m. than most people do all day.

We’re busy just trying to get out the door on time. While I’m not heading to the office these days, I’m not sleeping in.

Yesterday before 8:00 a.m., I was on my way to Sandston Unique Treasures, a gift shop, for coffee and conversation at Eastern Henrico Business Association’s inaugural morning meeting. http://www.ehba.us/

Afterwards, I stopped briefly at home to change clothes, download photographs I had taken at the morning meeting, and shoot off a resume to a prospective employer before my next appointment. 

Then I zipped to a NAWBO/Extraordinary Women’s Exchange lunch meeting at Willow Oaks Country Club. http://www.nawborichmond.org/

I spent a couple of hours at Varina library doing some research.

 By 4 p.m. I was in Ettrick getting ready to coach Virginia State University students in Jonathon Young’s Professional Enhancement business class. http://www.vsu.edu/

It was after 6 p.m., before I headed home. The point is: We all have lots on our plates!   But we can’t forget to slow down every once in a while to keep from crashing and burning.

Don’t get me wrong. I enjoyed everything I did yesterday. I met new people while spending some time with others I’d met before.

For instance, at the coffee gathering, I got a chance to chat with Letty Mehfoud, who owns the business along with her husband.  Plus I discovered a new place to shop.

At lunch, the topic was heart health awareness for women. I learned a lot and left inspired to do better with my exercise routine. (Thanks Kathy Cain for the lunch invitation!)

And there’s nothing more fulfilling than helping young women and men get started in their careers so the VSU visit was well worth my time.

But by the time I got home after 7 p.m. I was more than ready to chill out. Dinner was leftovers. Then I spent some down time with my hubby watching a WCVE program about kid’s TV shows. http://ideastations.org/

As I job hunt, reconnect with friends, volunteer and get to know more about my community, I’m making sure I make some “me” time.

What about you? Are you making time for yourself? What do you do to relax and unwind? I’m always looking for new chill out ideas.

The big game has started. I’ll be joining the millions who are watching. If you wonder why some women are bigger sports fans than men here’s what Sande Snead and I found out.  http://tinyurl.com/46p295l

 I continue to be amazed, in a good way, about the power of connecting with other women (and men as well).

I suggest using social media such as LinkedIn as a way to connect especially long distance, but it is the face-to-face connections that I think are more beneficial.

You never know who you will meet, who they will know, or where it will all lead.

One example: When I first came to Richmond to work at the Times-Dispatch, Robyn Bumgartner was a human resources manager there. She helped me get situated in town and find my way around the company.

Robyn later left the paper. Then I left the paper. Then I reconnected with Robyn. She now works for the Virginia Employment Commission. Talk about a great connection and resource!

Robyn has been a listening ear and she also e-mailed me information about a networking event last night at the Innsbrook Resource Workforce Center.

I attended and met a lot of folks. I‘ve already heard from two of the women I met last night (thanks Melissa Gay and Madga Ruesch) and I’ll touch base with the others before the weekend is over.

Or consider this connection: Not long after I came to Richmond, I met Bill Harrison, director of public affairs at the Virginia Capital Region of the American Red Cross. I attended a couple meetings with him on behalf of the RTD.

 Now that I’ve got some free time on my hands, I’m volunteering for the Red Cross. When I mentioned to Bill that I had sent a resume to a certain media outlet, he reminded me that I had met one of the company’s top executives at a Red Cross meeting. He even dropped the guy a note letting him know I was looking for a job.

I followed up with a call to the executive and, low and behold, we had both worked for the same media company years before.

OK. So far none of these connections have lead to a job but who knows what may happen. It’s all about making connections!

What’s your best networking story or do you have networking tips to share? Let me know.

Now is the time for women to lead, to transform the meaning of power, to create peace and claim their wisdom. Iron Butterflies are doing it. http://www.ironbutterflies.com/

Those words introduce women to Birute Regine who encourages us to transform ourselves and our corner of the world using leadership focused on collaboration. Karen Chase, a new friend and local business owner, introduced me to writings by Birute and invited me to the Richmond gathering of Iron Butterflies. http://www.224design.com

Last night about 15 women gathered in a high rise condo downtown. Three hours later, I left energized.

I’ve now added “Iron Butterflies: Women Transforming Themselves and the World” to my must-read list.

There are millions of ways to make a difference in your part of the world. The point is that we need to do something. How are you working to make a difference?  I’d love to hear what you’re done recently that made you feel good about yourself and your world.